Humboldt Revolution

I was in court and took notes again today but have not written for the blog so will include the briefest of synopsis here and do catch up with a more complete account of today’s and tomorrow’s episodes of the continuing soap opera of PL vs scruffy environmentalists tomorrow.

Today’s session consisted almost entirely of Kimberly Starr questioning Carl Anderson who is chief of security for PL’s timber holdings. The judge admonished Ms. Starr repeatedly when Mr. Anderson gave duplicitous answers and generally seemed more tired and out of sorts than previously. Turning things around is a very common phenomena in the modern world where we see the most evil people in our society parading as “Christians” and the members of the Bush administration, who to a man went to great lengths to avoid service in Vietnam while acting as hawks, and their minions running down Kerry and others who actually did go, get shot and so on. Judge Wilson did this to a considerable degree as well today. Suffice it to say that the fact that Maxxam owns the courts and all three branches of government along with other mega corporations and every time they run little people through their kangaroo courts it emphasis the justification for civil disobedience though I personally doubt it’s effectiveness. One thing is for certain; whether you agree with their methods or not their determination is inspirational and I would like to think worth the price they are paying. One activist of meager means was SLAPPed with a million dollar (mis)judgement which she framed and now displays on her wall…

Monday’s session, which didn’t start until 9:38, saw a resumption of Ayr’s questioning of Mr. Bettis. The questioning addressed the degree to which Mr. Bettis was aware of the environmentalists purpose. The witnesses for PL and their attorney Mr. Gans have steadfastly used the phrase “illegal trespassers” to describe the protesters and seek to avoid any acknowledgement of their motivation or move in this case towards a “necessity defense”, i.e. that the activities of the activists were done as a matter of necessity to prevent irreparable harm (to the eco-system and the individual monumentally old trees.) Mr. Bettis grudgingly acknowledged a vague awareness of attempts to purchase the land on Rainbow Ridge and a similarly vague knowledge of a stay of logging in effect for the area in question issued by Judge Golden though, as before seemed to remember better that it was lifted for some Timber Harvest Plan (areas) later. Mr. Bettis denied being “the public face” of PL after acknowledging that he took David Chain’s mother on a tour of PL land and though he has been the PL main employee who appears in court on their behalf in the dozens of cases involving environmentalists’ protests.

At this point Ayr turned the thread to question Mr. Bettis directly as to his ever having witnessed his (Ayr’s) presence at such an incident or known him to have caused any harm to PL to which Mr. Bettis replied simply “no”. Ayr finished his questioning by asking Mr. Bettis if he “could say how long it takes to grow a 200 year old tree”. Mr. Bettis seemed a little confused and maybe suspicious but answered “200 years”. Their was a moment of levity in the court room and Mr. Bettis left the stand at 9:56.

Carl Anderson was then called to the stand by Mr. Gans and began his testimony by stating that he had been employed to provide security for PL’s timber holdings for 25 years and had received training via 10 years as a deputy with the Humboldt County Sheriff’s Department prior to that time. Mr. Gans proceeded to question him regarding his witnessing individual defendants at different protests which he proceeded to do. These included Ayr being arrested after leaving a tree he was in on Long Ridge on May 21st, 2000, Jack Nounan at Monument Gate 3 times between May 2000 and November 2001 where a gate was blockaded and Mr. Vonsabern though I am not sure which incident.
 Much of the time was taken up with attempts to lay foundation for the entry of Photos into evidence by Mr. Gans and objections to attempts to railroad it into evidence without laying a foundation that Mr, Anderson had witnessed the events depicted. In one of the previous trials it was shown that PL had introduced photos from different incidents as being from the same time and place. Two videos were offered into evidence but not shown after Ayr stipulated that what was depicted in them was true and accurate as to his actions. They may be shown in part or in their entirety later.

Court was recessed at noon until Wednesday at 8:30.

Friday’s session saw some hint that a necessity defense may be allowed and the Judge even mentioned that the appellate court would likely uphold it however attempts to interject harm being done to the environment and the irreversible nature of cutting down such old trees in such a long established ecosystem were blocked at almost every turn though the judge softened on this some towards the end of the session.

Ms. Starr continued questioning of Mr. Bettis by inquiring about the effects medication he must take has on his memory and he said that it is a known side effect though when asked if it diminishes his ability to do his job he bristled and answered in the negative.

Ms. Starr asked questions that often required a yes or no answer and some explanatory background frame of reference which Mr. Gans and Judge Wilson referred to as vague and compound. This was especially noticeable when the question of Mr. Bettis’ and PL’s standard procedure for dealing with protesters or various types of trespassers was breached in an apparent effort to show prejudicial treatment of protesters by PL and the Sheriff’s department. (Goals of this line of questioning are purely my speculation). Judge Wilson also declined to strike any of Mr. Bettis’ narrative (non) responses to yes or no questions.

The judge and Mr. Gans did however jump to block attempts to address changes in logging practices that took place after the Maxxam takeover of PL and mention of Charles Hurwitz name seemed to produce a small panic which led to further narrowing the focus for the defendants.

Questions regarding abuse of defendant’s possession, throwing their food and other possessions down the hill for instance, brought a sort of necessity defense answer from Mr. Bettis who redefined these actions as necessary to clear the road.

Mr. Vonsabern questioned Mr. Bettis on the positioning of a road, it’s being moved and the alleged practice of PL of placing required “No Trespassing” signs up after arrests of protesters. Mr. Bettis explained vagaries and inconsistencies in boundary lines and claimed that protesters always ripped  previously posted “No Trespassing” signs down. Mr. Vonsabern was also quickly rebuffed when he attempted to pursue PL’s legal ownership of the land by tracing it’s ownership back to genocide against it’s occupants prior to the U.S. government’s seizing it and issuing patent deeds to private individuals as beyond the scope of this trial. The judge did allow very limited discussion on the endangered species act. During Mr. Vonsabern’s questioning Mr. Bettis revisited his apparent odd inconsistent statement in early testimony that he was at the airport on September 11th, 2001, the day of the attacks on the World Trade Center and pentagon carried out using large passenger aircraft by stating that he had gone to the airport to see his parents off or pick them up and was in Judge Miles court later that day.

Jack Nounan questioned Mr. Bettis on his opinion of why protesters are protesting which was objected to and upheld by the judge. He asked further questions concerning moving boundary lines and Mr. Bettis clarified that the road in question was moved from inside the state park on land deeded to it by PL in 1967 to just inside PL’s current boundary.

Ayr Eisenberg questioned Mr. Bettis on how long he has been property manager and how long he has worked for PL. He had formerly stated “20 to 30″ years as property manager and  Mr. Eisenberg seemed to be inquiring as to how he could not know more specifically than that. Asked in a way that allowed Mr. Bettis to launch into a narrative, the question of how Maxxam’s takeover changed PL, Mr. Bettis began a very flattering account of a benevolent fisheries project he was involved in and allowed that timber harvests increased though was guarded as to how much so and no reference was made as to changes in how harvesting was accomplished. Mr. Eisenberg questioned Mr. Bettis on the different shell companies, SCOPAC, PALCO etc and Mr. Bettis explained but when Mr Eisenberg inquired as to whether some were created primarily to accept liability for the criminal actions of others he was shut down immediatly. Mr. Eisenberg’s attempt to establish genocide as the means of acquiring the land in the 18th century making it ill gotten gains was again quickly objected to and sustained for being outside the scope of this proceeding. Asked if he was aware of protesters being harmed or killed on PL land he said he was aware of more than one PL employee being killed and “a” protester being killed. I would note that David Chain was killed a few years ago when a tree was felled on him by an angry tree feller who had been swearing and expressing that he wished he had a firearm to kill the protesters at that site for which a court order halting cutting had been issued. It spite of this it is not generally believed the logger intended to kill him but just became criminally negligent out of anger and can also be heard on the audio tape of the incident going into a state of extreme emotional distress upon seeing the crushed body of Mr. Chain. Asked if PL had taken any remedial action to prevent such tragedies in the future Mr. Bettis said he “remembered something about that. Mr. Eisenberg returned to scenes depicted in the video of a tee pee being pushed down the side of a steep hill and asked Mr. Bettis if they had checked to see if anyone was in it. Mr. Bettis replied in the affirmative. At this point Judge Wilson recessed court until Monday at 9:30 explaining that his daughter started school that day and he wanted to be there. My impression was that this, while being true, was an attempt to re-establish the image of caring to argue Mr. Eisenberg’s suggestions that protesters have been brutally slaughtered in the past, the bombing of Judi Barri and Darryl Cherney and others have Cherny been mentioned previously. Sort of like Fox “news” propagandizing for aggressive war which is killing thousands of men, women and children and then running a “human interest” story showing how they love kittens so much that firemen rescued one in a remote corner of Indiana or the like.

Benevolent application of the double standard.
By Administrator
Today’s episode of the SLAPP of the four remaining defendants in a case stretching back 5 years saw the continuation of evidence presented by SCOPAC and the cross examination of Richard Bettis, property manager for SCOPAC who served as foundation for the video depicting the removal and arrest of the protesters on Rainbow Ridge in 2001. When questioned by Kim Starr about his whereabouts on September 11th, 2001 Mr. Bettis said he was “at the airport”. When presented with an excerpt from the transcript of his testimony in court on that date he said he then recalled that he was not at the airport but in court. While one might think this confusion as to his whereabouts on the day the trade center and Pentagon were attacked would serve fairly well to impeach his credibility judge Wilson jumped in to characterize it as “having his memory refreshed”. The court personnel have been less dramatic than those in the last SLAPP under judge Quentin Kopp over the same issues but making faces, sidelong glances amongst themselves and other less than subtle indications of prejudice were in strong evidence. When one man entered the court room dressed in 1950s style garb and haircut a court employee hurried over from her station to caution him that if he was to be a witness he would have to leave as witness are sequestered. No such cautionary courtesy was extended to younger people who arrived in hoodies, jeans and wearing no makeup. I explained to this gentleman, who had sat next to me, that this was to impede any attempt to collaborate perjurious testimony and he said he could testify in this trial and would like to collaborate (presumably such false) testimony.   He proceeded to alternate between observing the proceedings and reading the free papers he had brought into the court room with him. Reading is expressly prohibited in court rooms and one woman sympathetic to the environmentalists who forgot to bring paper to take notes on had earlier brought a newspaper into the court room to use to take notes on was admonished immediatly when she got it out to do so. I gave her some of my paper. While Mr. Wilson, as I have stated before, seems like the best one could hope for in the Humboldt County Superior Court, being evidently more intelligent than all of his peers, the prejudice and arrogance of power is not absent either. When Kimberly Starr requested that the volume be increased so as to hear dialogue in the tape Wilson denied the request saying that the dialogue was irrelevant until Mr. Gans also requested that this be done.

Mr. Gans moved on to the Scotia incident when another car was placed on the sidewalk in front of SCOPAC’s office in their wholly owned company town of Scotia also in 2001 to show a pattern by the defendants and also attempt, again, to depict the defendants as a threat etc. in order to satisfy the letter of the injunctive law.

From there Mr. Gans jumped back to the Rainbow Ridge incident and produced various pieces of evidence in an effort to establish SCOPAC’s ownership of the land that demonstration occurred on and legal their right of way for the roads leading to that land.

On cross examination Mr. Bettis testified that a “compliance officers” deal with property line disputes, evaluate trespasser status as to whether hunters, lumber poachers, protesters etc. answering to Mr. Bettis as far as I could tell only when convenient to their testimony. He also claimed to be unaware of a lot of activity that is in the domain of sub-contacters.

When Kimberly Starr’s questioning addressed the illegalities of the timber harvesting they were blockading, which occurred in defiance of a stay of logging issued by judge Golden, Mr. Bettis admitted having heard of it but denied knowing what the dates of the stay were though seemed to recall very well that the stay was later lifted.

During Ms. Starr’s cross examination Judge Wilson interrupted Ms. Starr numerous times saying that her questions did not seem to focus tightly enough and even proceeded to cross examine the witness for her though seemed to miss her points which all seemed clear to me albeit complex but not vague abstractions. She seems firmly grounded in reality if not the form over content fantasy land of the court.

Ms. Starr questioned Mr. Bettis on why the protesters were allowed to stay at the location on Rainbow Ridge for a couple of months before suddenly being besieged. Mr. Bettis did not have a firm answer but said maybe because of weather, maybe because of logistics involved in assembling crews to do removal. Their own Scotia fire department does the extraction with Humboldt County Sheriff’s Department deputies. With a multi-month response time for these emergency agencies you can understand why crime is rampant and our jails are full of homeless people and other slow moving innocents.

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The court action today began with opening statements by the defendants who sited the irreparable damage to the land caused by PL’s logging practices as basis for a defense based on necessity, that is that it was necessary to intervene to save the forrest similar to a defense someone who runs into a burning building to save the occupants might mount if charged with trespassing. They also point out and will attempt to substantiate that they had no intention to harm SCOPAC or their land, assuming it is their land, an obvious basis for obtaining an injunction. They claim, and apparently have evidence to back up their claim, that SCOPAC, PL, never submitted evidence that they even own this land in the 5 years this redundant litigation* has been held over the heads of the defendants. Other irreparable harm they allege that has been caused by the type of logging PL engages in that they seek, and sought then, to stop includes mud slides in a geologically unstable area where 3 tectonic plates cause frequent earth quakes and where winter rains average higher amounts than anywhere else in Humboldt county, double what many other areas get.

As if to emphasize this regional geological instability the lights in the court house went out at 10:21 just after Mr. Gans began to present evidence, a video tape, of one incident from 2001. I didn’t feel an earth quake but it is a reminder in the minds of most North Coast residents especially when in the center of a large concrete structure such as the court house. The lights remained out only briefly. Mr. Gans stated that they intend to introduce the numerous arrests of these and other activists since the preliminary injunction was issued in 2001 as being pertinent to the case while trying to exclude all of PL’s record of law breaking as irrelevant…it is relevant to the necessity defense however and that is, in truth, the purpose of the protests which have taken place in a situation where all legal recourse and much recourse to public forum has been brutally squashed by this corrupt mega corporation which, not coincidently, has it’s home office in Texas.

Judge Wilson, in his usual condescending tone, rejected the lack of notice re evidence from SCOPAC saying that would be beneficial to the defendants since they could site that and get the evidence bumped. We’ll see, Dominic Vonzabern began to ask a question and the lights again went out which he commented appeared ominous. Whether it was an omen or not I can’t say but it did have that feel to it. It was an even briefer outage than the forest one. Judge Wilson answered Mr. Vonzabern’s question concerning the multiplicity of different litigations on this same matter by siting the O.J. Simpson trials noting that the burden of proof is greater in criminal than civil cases and that Mr. Simpson was later found guilty in a civil trial after winning the criminal trial.

The showing of the video commenced and played with only brief interruptions for Mr. Gans to note points of evidence until court recessed for the day at noon. The judge became annoyed by the noise of a grinder while the segment depicting the removal of the roof of a vehicle played and asked that the volume be turned down, joking that he needed ear plugs. I can only imagine being one of the three protestors in the car…

Court, and the video, will resume at 8:45 tomorrow, August 24th, 2006. Your attendance will be welcome either to support the defendants personally, to support their cause on behalf of the planet we all share or to see what goes on in the courts of the most imprisoned people on earth.

* see previous posts in this category

I have been in attendance at the current PL SLAPP which involves PL, AKA SCOPAC, seeking a permanent injunction against the 4 remaining protestors who have not previously settled. PL and their attorneys, who both enjoy a very close relationship with the court here, focused much of their pretrial efforts on avoiding a jury trial. They did this by not seeking monetary damages. A “simple” injunction does not legally mandate a jury of your peers try you. To see this small band of scruffy protestors stand up to this evil Goliath who has so much money and has bought so much political influence is both inspirational and so sad. Sad that there is no real legal recourse to remedy the destruction of our quality of life and that of the planet other than the confrontational activities of these activists. They are braver than me or have a firmer grip on reality…firm enough to be driven by fear to do what they are doing. Not the fear of ridiculous threats as advanced my propagandists in this administration used to manipulate the electorate in order to gain and hold onto power in order to enrich themselves but the genuine fear of our own destruction at the hands of these evil people. The judge, while apparently more intelligent than others in this rural venue, certainly has a pre conceived notion about the parties involved. He claimed he “expects that Mitchell, Brisso, Delaney and Vrieze, SCOPAC’s attorneys, will “deal with an open hand” though referred to Kimberly Starr’s arguments as “nattering” in the next breath. Judge Wilson also sided with Mr. Gans, lead attorney for Mitchell, Brisso, Delaney and Vrieze, without a pause to consider when they stated that they had submitted all of their evidence to Ms. Starr and her co-defendants and rejected out of hand Ms. Starr’s complains that they had not done so in a timely fashion, had not submitted the evidence stated such as one document that was for a different time period than the one in question in this matter and more. I remember from previous litigation that SCOPAC had submitted photos from different days, different seasons of the year and claimed they proved an event happened on a particular day and that they were all taken on that day. The environmentalists motion to exclude inflammatory labels such as “eco-terrorists” and so on was not granted in any meaningful way either, in spite of the environmentalists siting several of their number who have been murdered or died under suspicious circumstances. Instead judge Wilson said he would not be swayed by inflammatory speech and noted that, as an attorney, he had represented a minor child who had had pepper spray dabbed in her eyes in the infamous case of a decade or so ago. The results of that litigation still do not prohibit law enforcement from using such tactics though did make three quarters of a million county taxpayer bucks for Mitchell, Brisso, Delaney and Vrieze. SCOPAC also filed a motion to have certain evidence and speech excluded such as any reference to their long history of consciously running afoul of the law, their connection with parent company the notoriously corrupt Maxxam of Texas. The definition of “damage” was revisited several times with the apparent differences being dictated by the desired ruling by SCOPAC. In the end the environmentalists will not be allowed a jury of their peers, many of their witnesses and a number of other impediments are being placed in their path especially a=in regards to a defense that there is no other recourse that direct action given the corruption of the legal system and SCOPAC’s tremendous power over it which includes financing a failed “grass roots” recall of D.A. Paul Gallegoes for his attempt to take them to task for the fraud they routinely engage in. SCOPAC also wants to forbid the environmentalists to mention that. Opening statements for SCOPAC were made by Mr. Gans under the vigilant eye of firm partner Paul Brisso. He claimed the environmentalists posed a threat by their presence, caused them economic damage and were breaking the law siting about 70 arrests over the years. With a faux benevolent flourish, he also claimed a permanent injunction would prevent future court time being “wasted” on the protestors. The environmentalists will present their opening argument in the morning. (Wednesday, August 23rd) The 4 defendants in this overbearing litigation by SCOPAC could use all the moral support they can get and your supportive presence in the court room would be welcomed. 8:30 to noon every day for the next couple or three weeks. Court room 3 Humboldt County Superior Court, 825 5th St., Eureka, CA 95501. map and driving directions. Anyone who believes that their is legal recourse against a powerfull greed driven corporation such as this should also attend this trial.

The Trial of the 5 year old Mattole SLAPP is getting underway Monday August 21^st at 8:45 in the Humboldt County Superior Court (825 5th St., Eureka). This malicious litigation was revived after almost 5 years at it’s statutory limits. Pacific Lumber has become Scotia Pacific, Scotia Pacific Holding Co., Scotia Pacific Company LLC, Pacific Lumber Company, Scopac and Salmon Creek LLC under Charles Hurwitz’s slash and burn Maxxam Corp. and they are liquidating many of it’s assets and automating jobs out of existence at this point. Among assets they are liquidating are large tracts of increasingly rare old growth forest. Jack Nounan, Kimberly Starr, Ayr and a few others remain on board in the environmentalist, and I would add anti-corruption, side of this. Your supportive presence in the courtroom will be appreciated by the beleaguered warriors who are fighting for all of us, including owners and employees of Scopac who must also breath and otherwise enjoy or endure the quality of life they are so gravely affecting. More anouncements concerning this should be forthcoming in the very near future.

Lebanon has only momentarily taken attention off the wars of disintegration in Iraq and Afghanistan and those many smaller, less widely known 3rd world turmoil’s. War makers are forever in process of preparing the next stage, which always includes ‘collateral damage’, the procedure which routinely exterminates the lives of both foreign and our own. As Americans we must learn how lethal and brutal military objectives can become.
The truth of 9/11 must be told, for it demonstrates how violent means have come to be so defiled as to have no remaining integrity left at all, climaxing long generations of oppressions elsewhere with this massive American trauma staged at home on 9/11, 2001, used as the rationale for forging ahead in two major wars and preparing for more. Such expansion and exploitation, arbitrarily and continuously sacrifices greater numbers of peoples.
Extensive researches by many scholars, engineers and scientists have accumulated precise and irrefutable evidences which show the impossibility of what the government would have us believe happened that day, as well as what proceeded such an assault and what was done to cover it up.
We must open our eyes and be prepared for the worst, for it means facing just such irreconcilable hell as having to acknowledge how ones own government can and does operate this way.
This government has chosen to ignore us, because not daring to allow public examination of their part in this premeditated extermination of thousands of Americans and/or incomprehensible dereliction of duty in defending us. It’s got to be one way or the other….or both. One need only consider this for themselves.
Whether this government was intimately involved in plotting and carrying out these tragedies and/or totally derelict in their duties to defend us has all gone unanswered by them for these past 5 years. Their complicity is too obvious in 1) allowing for the thousands of explosive devices to be set and access of crews to carry out very precise demolition procedures of three major buildings in New York, including one government building housing agents and officials of the FBI and Defense Department, while also 2) totally neglecting their duty in providing any defense whatsoever over the skies of New York and Washington , D.C. at the very moment this same government told us it anticipated such an attack.
The situation surrounding all of this is to cruel to be conceivable, yet we must see it for what it is and be doing all within our power to remove this cancer from our lives. If we ever desire to build a legitimate form of governing, it means beginning with the truth we so sorely need to continue.
This is possibly the greatest quandary we’ve faced as a nation and a people . We have the evidences. to totally discount official reports of that catastrophe. But our most important question is whether this government will be answerable to us . Either they willingly open to a thorough investigation into their negligences and/or their crimes … or this clear signal telling us they no longer find it necessary to answer for their misuse of power, essentially a silent takeover of our country. There seems to be no other way of summing this up.
Obviously we cannot afford to trust living under such leadership. Their versions of answers or refusals are wholly unacceptable and do not serve. Their critical irresponsibility and even probable hostility toward citizens of the United States can no longer be hidden beneath the protection of socalled national security, deceptions nor government secrecy. Regardless of who is responsible or who may be being protected by those who know and do not wish to step forward, none of it is worthy of anything less now than full disclosure, those reponsible brought to justice and removal from office of anyone even indirectly involved. Nothing less than full justice ought to be acceptable to the American people. Not under the circumstance created by this tragedy. The exposure of this corruption of governing, goes beyond what we have known, upending Americas very sense of itself…as this truth is finally allowed to sink in among greater numbers of peoples across the land.
It is unavoidable that we make our case and let this government know we will never accept these hideous crimes nor their refusals to cooperate in a thorough investigation. Extremely important to remember is the passion we found in facing up to an intolerable situation in Vietnam, forced to see and come to believe governments capacity for doing such things and in turn, making them reel from the impact of our demands.
The country will never be the same, once enough Americans come to grips with what the evidences say of this monstrous plot with` all of what it took to carry it out.  

The rallies in Arcata and Eureka on Friday and Saturday August 11th and 12th respectively drew more people than many expected. I attended the Eureka Rally on Saturday at the court house and my amateurish video is available to download here in medium resolution RealMedia format. It is a large file, 120 Megabytes and it is quite blurry but works and you should be able to watch it out a dirt road in the hills connected with a modem on your phone line. It includes almost all of the speakers addresses. Speakers included Ellen taylor, Shane Brinton, Jack Nounan and a number of other knowledgeable local voices. Meanwhile the main Washington D.C. rally drew about 30,000 protestors. The Eureka rally received local coverage in the Eureka Reporter and the Times Standard which included this photo on the front page of it’s Sunday edition;

For those who think that street demonstrations are passe due to ineffectiveness I beg to differ as do those who attended these rallies and many passers by who honked and hooted their approval. Only a couple crude characters offered negative feedback from the passing traffic. A much higher ratio of positive to negative than a couple years ago. The fact that the portion of the American population that still supports this aggression has dwindled to less than 40% in spite of the massive propaganda machine seems strong evidence that we have had a powerful effect on the electorate along with increases in “alternative” media which I think we can also claim an influence upon. The surest sign of our success, however, will be an attack from the extreme right wing neocons in the run up to the mid term elections. The loss by 3 term senator Joe Lieberman in the Connecticut Democratic primary specifically for his support of the invasion and occupation of Iraq and his support of G.W. Bush will not be taken lightly by the authoritarian neocons and their win at any cost, democracy be damned, philosophy of self righteous greed.

There was some talk of an October 5th rally and a September 11th rally, the latter to address questions concerning the wild 911 conspiracy theory; the one our government has foisted off on us that defies common sense, the laws of physics and, in the case of the investigation, the law of the land.